Tuesday, October 26, 2010

I never imagined...


Honestly, I never imagined that I would be a parent to a special needs child, let alone TWO special needs children! It's amazing to see God's plan work out in the midst of pain and heartache. Broken dreams brought me two incredible blessings that I am so thankful for every day. It's so very challenging to parent a child with developmental delays. Not only do you have to be a developmental milestone specialist, but you also have to be a specialist with the child God has blessed you with. Some days are so very hard and I often wonder how I will get through the day.

Although there are days that I honestly think, WHY ME? I honestly can say WHY NOT ME? No parent dreams that their child will be "different" or "labeled." Cody has taught me many, many lessons, the first one is unconditional love. There is no one on earth that has more unconditional, pure love as Cody. He absolutely loves you with his whole heart. He has also taught me patience and hope. Doctors were not hopeful with Cody's future. Cody proved them wrong every time. He walked when they were skeptical, he talked and now Cody is reading. My heart was overjoyed last night as I was listening to him read his book he brought home from school. As a special needs parent, you learn to celebrate any progress whether it be big or small.

I always just knew deep in my heart that I would adopt (starting with the creation of Cabbage Patch Kids). God was preparing my heart so early at a ripe age of 7. I did not know anyone who adopted or was an adoptee but I wanted to adopt a child.

Then infertility hit at such an very early age, so I had time to prepare for what God had in store for Matt and I. It was a long, hard, difficult road to travel. I wouldn't want anyone to have to go down it, but despite the heartache, God did bless me with the desires of my heart....but very different than the plans I had made.

"For I know the plans I have for you,' declares the LORD, '
plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11

This is my life verse. It sums up everything that I hold dear. I can rest assured that God has special plans for my life and my family's. Whether we are complete as a family of four or God blesses us with another adoption, I will be content. I recently discovered that each day is an absolute gift and I will never take another day for granted!

2 comments:

Jen Stevens said...

Jen, you rock! You're a great mom to your kiddos and God was right to choose you for each other.
I look forward to seeing what God has in store for your family and I know that no matter what you will continue to make beauty from the ashes.

Toni said...

This is such a beautiful post, Jen. I know you speak from your heart because I've read your blog for years and this is a genuine reflection of what pours out of your heart and into your children in so many wonderful ways. Your two kids are so precious to our God, and to you. They are WELL loved.
blessings,
Toni